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Zoom Aficionado Jeffrey Toobin Announces Departure From CNN to Spend More Time With Himself

Zoom Aficionado Jeffrey Toobin Announces Departure From CNN to Spend More Time With Himself

“Friends, I’ve decided that, after 20 years, I’m leaving @cnn after my vacation. Was great to spend my last day on air with pals Wolf, Anderson and Don. Love all my former colleagues.”

Jeffrey Toobin’s legal career dates all the way back to the Iran-Contra years when he worked as an associate counsel for the Independent Counsel team led by Lawrence Walsh, a former U.S. Deputy Attorney General. After that, Toobin took on the job of assistant U.S. Attorney for New York’s Eastern District. He then went on to write for left-wing publications like The New Yorker while also providing legal analysis for news outlets like ABC News and CNN, the latter of which he began working at in 2002.

Though some (mostly on the left) would say he’s had a distinguished career, Toobin will forever be known by most people as the guy who got caught by his New Yorker colleagues fondling himself on a Zoom video call in October 2020, an embarrassing incident over which he ultimately lost his New Yorker gig.

In the aftermath, Toobin took some time off from CNN, which took no action against him over what happened during that infamous video call. But nearly two years after the incident and a little over one year after he returned to CNN, Toobin has decided to call it quits, announcing Friday it in a tweet on which he limited comments:

Naturally, the double entendres were fast and flowing:

As a general rule, I hold the mindset that a person’s life shouldn’t be defined by one singular incident where they fell from grace (assuming that incident didn’t involve committing a horrible crime), but one exception to that rule for me is Jeffrey Toobin, whose worst known offense, in my opinion, was trying to force a young woman he had an affair with into having an abortion.

Back in the early 2000s, Toobin—who is married and has two children—had a long-running affair, and at one point, she became pregnant by Toobin. Though she had the child, it was reported later that Toobin was such a concerned lover that he actually offered to pay for an abortion.

According to a source, when she refused, Toobin told her she shouldn’t expect any help from him. The New York Daily News wrote about the details of their on-again/off-again affair at the time:

“Jeff and Casey saw each other off and on over the years,” says one source. “She was married to someone else for two years. After her divorce, she started seeing Jeff again. He said he was going to leave his wife for her. But, by then, Casey had begun to distrust him. She suspected he had several other mistresses.”


Greenfield underwent a risky DNA test while pregnant, but Toobin didn’t provide his sample and stopped talking to her, according to sources. On the day she gave birth, Greenfield e-mailed Toobin, inviting him to meet his son, Rory. A source says Toobin didn’t reply.

Toobin ultimately cooperated with a DNA test that proved he was Rory’s dad. In February, a Manhattan Family Court judge ordered him to pay child support. When he refused to pay the full amount, say sources, Greenfield’s lawyer threatened to notify his employers and garnish his wages; Toobin then paid up.

Sounds like a real peach of a guy, doesn’t he?

Despite that, CNN actually had him on several times to provide commentary on the Mississippi abortion law case that eventually led to the Supreme Court overturning Roe v. Wade.

Toobin, of course, was opposed to it being overturned.

Though Toobin has not said what his plans are post-CNN, our sources tell us that he wanted more time to take matters into his own hands.

Actually, our sources haven’t told us anything about Toobin. But it’s not too hard to guess what he’ll be up to now that he’s decided to pull out of CNN.

— Stacey Matthews has also written under the pseudonym “Sister Toldjah” and can be reached via Twitter. —


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Close The Fed | August 14, 2022 at 10:17 am

HahahahaHAAAAAHAHAHahahahaaaaaa – – – Oh, that headline!!

Morning Sunshine | August 14, 2022 at 10:27 am

And that story is exactly why so many MEN are against the Roe V. Wade overturn.
If they can convince women that sex is free and without consequence, then they can have as much guilt-free sex as they want. No matter how it effects the women involved. Now women are “having” to be more discerning about the men they sleep with, and THAT is disturbing to the “use-em-and-lose-em” culture,

He was probably fired. Warner Discovery is cleaning house. At CNN and elsewhere.

They recently memory holed (Woke) Batgirl: after $90 million was already spent on it. It will not be released anywhere. Not in the theatres, not on streaming services, not on DVD/BluRay/HD disk. It is as if it never existed.

Hopefully, Toobin is soon followed by Stelter, Lemon, and Acosta.

He will be fondling…er, fondly remembered.

E Howard Hunt | August 14, 2022 at 10:45 am

Would that he had taken Robert Browning’s words to heart- “ A man’s reach should exceed his grasp.”

This contemptible, pervert-wanker will never be able to escape the shameful shadow of his act of ill-timed and obnoxious onanism.

The Gentle Grizzly | August 14, 2022 at 11:08 am

English is a fascinating language. “He plays by himself” means the child is a loner. “He plays with himself “ means… something else.

Well now he can come to grips with himself. Take matters in hand as it were.

Russ from Winterset | August 14, 2022 at 11:47 am

True to form, rather than waiting around for CNN to fire him……….

He took matters into his own hands.

I’m amused how Tubin has contributed to pop culture. He will be remembered beyond his career for a single act. At least we hope it was a single act.

He is a disgusting pig

Hands by the way

Selfiesm in the modern model.

Jeffery Toobin is getting a new gig on MSNBC along with Anthony Weiner. The program will be called, “Let’s Go Weiner Toobin.”

Comanche Voter | August 14, 2022 at 3:39 pm

The Toobster will no doubt have a firm grasp on his retirement–or at least the little tuber that led to his retirement.

“In February, a Manhattan Family Court judge ordered him to pay child support. When he refused to pay the full amount, say sources, Greenfield’s lawyer threatened to notify his employers and garnish his wages; Toobin then paid up.”

Wait ’til you hear how much his hand is suing for.

He isn’t the only sleazy person to have worked at CNN. Good riddance to him. Hope there are more to come.

There’s a rumor making the rounds that Toobin’s favorite oldies group is Three Dog Night. Every time he hears the words “Easy to be heartless …” he heads for the bathroom.