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New York Times Newsroom Infested With Bed Bugs

New York Times Newsroom Infested With Bed Bugs

Perhaps the most interesting aspect of the report is that these insects are found where people sleep.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wl_v0yaPGyU

There are reports that evolutionary perfected blood-sucking creatures have infested The New York Times building.

No, I am not talking about its questionably accurate “reporters.” It seems the newsroom of the nation’s “paper of record” is infested with bed bugs.

Multiple Times staffers shared the news on social media Monday: The famed newsroom has an infestation of bed bugs.

According to an internal email sent to employees — obtained by Slate, the bugs were found in the “wellness room” on the second floor, on a couch on the third floor, and in a booth on the fourth floor over the weekend.

The email went on to say that “evidence of possible bedbug activity was found in a few personal lockers on the third floor,” and that “treatment is underway” for those whose lockers were contaminated.

Assistant editor Stuart Thompson shared the news on Twitter, before columnist Sopan Deb (apparently a Trekker) joked that he’d “ordered shields up” and “phasers to be set on stun” to combat the critters.

I know President Donald Trump was joking when he said that he was “The Chosen One.” However, I am not so confident he can’t call down plagues upon the enemies of the American people.

The problem of bed bug infestation has been growing in this country. Perhaps the most interesting aspect of the report is that these insects are found where people sleep, which could explain a lot of the New York Times recent editorial decisions.

Although the presence of bed bugs has traditionally been seen as a problem in developing countries, it has recently been spreading rapidly in parts of the United States, Canada, the United Kingdom, and other parts of Europe. Bed bugs have been found in five-star hotels and resorts and their presence is not determined by the cleanliness of the living conditions where they are found.

Bed bug infestations usually occur around or near the areas where people sleep. These areas include apartments, shelters, rooming houses, hotels, cruise ships, buses, trains, and dorm rooms. They hide during the day in places such as seams of mattresses, box springs, bed frames, headboards, dresser tables, inside cracks or crevices, behind wallpaper, or any other clutter or objects around a bed. Bed bugs have been shown to be able to travel over 100 feet in a night but tend to live within 8 feet of where people sleep.

The discovery has made for some very entertaining social media analysis.

There is good news for the employees. Bed bugs are not known to cause disease in humans. This differentiates the insects from the staff, which have been spreading Trump Derangement Syndrome for the past few years.

The real health threat from bed bugs comes from the itching and scratching from bites, which can lead to secondary infections.

However, bed bugs and Times’ reporters and pundits have two things in common: They both can be annoying and are difficult to get rid of.

[Featured image via YouTube]

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Comments

Headline should be “New York Times Journalist are Bed Bugs”

NYT bugged by Trump.

sarah singeworthy | August 27, 2019 at 9:53 am

The New York Times newsroom is infested with blood sucking parasites. Also, they have bedbugs.

Gives new meaning to the journalistic term “putting the paper to bed.”

First bedbugs, next the locusts, and then the plague. Well deserved for their leftist beliefs. KARMA!

No more office beds allowed! From now on, get your nookie in the backseat of your car in the parking garage.

“phasers to be set on stun” to combat the critters.

Why “stun”? Saving them for later?

Nuke it from space.

For a newsroom committed to antiracist ideology, they have a weird phobia about their bedbug colleagues. Can’t they see that diversity is their strength?

Comanche Voter | August 27, 2019 at 11:16 am

Bed bugs in the “wellness room”. Just what goes on in the wellness room? Is it sort of like a casting couch in Hollywood?

Well, It’s been noted for some time that the reporters at the NYT were “crazy as a bedbug.” Now we know why.

The jokes keep coming:

https://www.reddit.com/r/The_Donald/comments/cw5e1f/new_york_times_columnist_bret_stephens_quits/

https://thehill.com/homenews/media/458952-new-york-times-columnist-bret-stephens-quits-twitter-after-being-called-a

Brett Stephens got called a bedbug by some unknown jerk of a college professor, and chided said professor via email. Said professor was delighted to put the letter up on Twitter, and seems to be enjoying the notoriety of drawing blood. One has to wonder who is the real bedbug in this story. This turned into a morning’s kerfluffell, and now Brett Stevens is off Twitter.

Of course, the 14-year-olds over at The_Donald at Reddit (the quarantine warning page is dumb, just click right through it, nothing will happen) are all over it. They are calling Stevens a “snowflake,” a special term that translates to “oversensitive.”

I have no problem with Mr. Stevens telling off some ill-mannered wretch for calling him a “bedbug.” It’s an insult and a wordy response is appropriate.

I do question the nameless jerk’s judgment, and apparently none of his Twitter followers thought much of his sense of humor, until Stevens replied.

The one-liners practically write themselves here.

The Friendly Grizzly | August 27, 2019 at 4:51 pm

As was said to Mr. Berrigan, “Those aren’t bugs, Bunny…”.

Actually you can pick up bed bugs on a subway, one of the fringe benefits of living in a democrat run city.

tommy mc donnell | August 27, 2019 at 11:35 pm

their editorial staff has been infested with communists for a hundred years.

An infestation that is hard to get rid of….’nuke it from space, it’s the only way to be sure.’

DouglasJBender | August 28, 2019 at 4:33 am

In sleep-related news, I just realized something: If someone’s name is, “Leon Mamet” (“Mamet” being pronounced like “mam may”), then in those cases where he would sign his last name first, if he was called from that list (using that order of his name), it would be, “Mamet, Leon”. And it would be pronounced pretty much exactly like, “Mammalian”.

I discover odd things when I have insomnia.

The famed newsroom has an infestation of bed bugs.

They still have a newsroom?

New York Times Newsroom Infested With Bed Bugs,along with Commiecrat vermin.

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