Ben of Ben and Jerry’s Asks Twitter For Progressive Ice Cream Names, Hilarity Ensues
Who’s up for some Maxine’s Harass Mint and Utopian Breadline Pudding ice cream?
Twitter hashtag games are a fun and effective way of sharing our ideas, no less so now that Twitter is silencing conservatives. Case in point, Ben, of Ben and Jerry’s ice cream fame and fortune, coordinated a “name the ice cream for seven up and coming progressives” effort with MoveOn.org and got far more than he bargained for.
There was a time when conservatives dominated Twitter. Yes, really. We’re wittier, more clever, better informed, and just more fun than progressives, so when they rolled out nonsense like Obama’s Attack Watch, conservatives had a field day with the #AttackWatch hashtag game. The site didn’t survive the ridicule, and with Obama out of the White House, attackwatch.com is now for sale.
By the way, Misfit Politics’ “Attack Watch” ad is still the best of its genre. Absolutely hilarious and utterly, scathingly effective.
Perhaps Ben Cohen thought those days were far behind us?
Yo, internet! We need ur help to come up with 7 amazing flavors for 7 amazing up & coming progressives who could be headed to Congress in Nov. To sweeten the deal, Jerry & I will personally make a small batch of each of the winning flavors @MoveOn https://t.co/Gvn876rtTA
— Ben Cohen (@YoBenCohen) September 21, 2018
If so, he miscalculated, and I’m pretty sure he wasn’t expecting the hilarity that ensued. Here are seven of my favorites (tweets/attribution embedded below):
Maxine’s Harass Mint
Max Tax Tracks
Utopian Breadline Pudding
Rocky Road to Ruin
Other People’s Honey
Beto’s Hit and Rum Raisin
Sour Grapes
Leftists may run us off Twitter, but their hashtag “games” are boring, unimaginative, and cookie cutter. You know the drill: Trump, the GOP, [insert any Republican pol or voter] is racist, misogynist, xenophobic, blah blah blah. Yawn.
By contrast, conservatives on Twitter have a good grasp of the issues and don’t regurgitate talking points by rote. We also have a sense of humor.
https://twitter.com/BobInHaiti/status/1043477041977470976?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw
https://twitter.com/AndrewLongen/status/1043632783942389761?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw
Snowflake chip!! pic.twitter.com/511M12LWoy
— Jennifer (@jennikeenan) September 22, 2018
End of the Americone Dream
Anti-Semitic Crunch
Man Hating Maple
Half-Baked Ideas
New York Super Socialism Chunk
Everything But The Freedom
Hillary Hillary Zzzz Zzzz Zzzz https://t.co/yoOIj8ngJy— Nathan Wurtzel (@NathanWurtzel) September 22, 2018
Here's 8 in case there's one you don't want to use.
Asparagus Marxist Mocha
Chunky Gulag Swirl
Amaretto Alinski Mint
Gorilla Vanilla Chavez
Equality Toffee Coffee
Collective Caramel Delight
Allocated Apple Walnut
Venezuelan Truffle Crunchhttps://t.co/W8HsWOCexf— Mel Cargle (@cargle_mel) September 22, 2018
How about “I lose, I scream!!!”
— Jeffrey Owen (@jeffowen43) September 22, 2018
https://twitter.com/DizzyDean79/status/1043627751809462272?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw
Media meltdown
— tricia brasseur (@BrasseurTricia) September 22, 2018
Utopian Breadline pudding. We can all stand in line together to get our rations! No cutting @Ocasio2018
— Chris Torgerson (@c_torgerson) September 22, 2018
How about Ellison’s Punch? Or Blumenthals Fables?
— Joseph Bruno (@jbru6no) September 22, 2018
https://twitter.com/vonbismark/status/1043580435304013829?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw
Beto’s Hit and Run Rocky Road…
— Zone (@mahoneinthezone) September 22, 2018
https://twitter.com/huntsvut/status/1043631757944348672?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw
https://twitter.com/AndrewLongen/status/1043630878663102464?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw
https://twitter.com/JustEric/status/1043619029003452416?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw
Others I enjoyed:
Sour Grapes. I think it's perfect. Don't you?
— Kimberley Barreda ?? (@unlimbited) September 23, 2018
Hey @benandjerrys I have some ideas for your new flavors
Lying Lib Lemon
Obstructionist Orange
Schumer’s Shitty Apple Spice
Lock ‘er Up Lime
Pelosi’s Old Pomegranate Bits
Mad Max MelonI stopped buying your products since you backed a cop killer in the 80s#boycottbenandjerrys
— Joy Gee ✊? (@Joy109) September 22, 2018
Those who somehow weren’t aware of Ben and Jerry’s political bent are now boycotting them and have created the hashtag #boycottbenandjerrys since Ben didn’t bother to include a hashtag with his initial request. We’re always willing to help out with such oversights.
I will sure miss my Cherry Garcia. #boycottbenandjerrys
— sarasmlwd (@Sassafrascat) September 23, 2018
Unfollowing and boycotting! Thanks for showing your true colors! #boycottbenandjerrys
— Tiffany (@Halacey1974) September 22, 2018
https://twitter.com/breenbrooke/status/1043784140783591424
https://twitter.com/las_vegas009/status/1043891990721687553
@benandjerrys your ice cream will no longer be eaten in my household. Stay out of politics! #boycottbenandjerrys
— Pray for ?? (@Jlm9022) September 23, 2018
A truth bomb:
Politicizing products and services is a socialist strategy to divide the country. #MAGA #boycottbenandjerrys
— Clayton Franklin (@ClayFranklin) September 22, 2018
Interestingly, Ben’s Twitter profile page header consists of him “stamping money out of politics.”
A fact not lost on right-leaning Twitter users.
So @benandjerrys, a for profit company, wants to use capitalism to endorse @TheDemocrats who ironically want to pursue socialism.
Time to spend my money elsewhere! #BoycottBenandJerrys https://t.co/TGMaZjWPyl— ben lejeune (@theBenLeJeune) September 23, 2018
So, you're exploiting capitalism to raise money for your socialist causes and politicians… https://t.co/Ozwqn3ZMSf
— Fusilli Spock (@awstar11) September 22, 2018
https://twitter.com/NaughtyBeyotch/status/1043656238674989058
Twitter hashtag games are lots of fun; I’ve enjoyed participating in many over the years and have fond memories of #AttackWatch, #ObamaAteDog (and the related and hilarious #ObamaDogRecipes), #ILikeObamaCare, and #ThankYouHillary.
Oddly, the left doesn’t seem to go in for too many hashtag campaigns these days, so the Ben and Jerry’s misstep is particularly welcome.
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Comments
Are these the two guys who asked fora CEO to take all the risks in return for virtually no pay?
They really should donate all their assets to the poor.
How about commiecrea for a new flavor. Eat all you want. Pay me what you want.
Love it! 😀
No thanks, I’ll stick to Blue Bell, which is delicious, real ice cream and you get a full gallon for the price of one B&J cone.
These are hilarious suggestions.
All I could think of is Vice Cream, SJW Sherbet, Antifa Head Smash, and Spartacus Grandstand Gelato.
Vice Cream! Love love love! I’m also totally tickled by “Antifa Head Smash” and “Spartacus Grandstand Gelato.”
So awesome!
One question: does the SJW Sherbet come in a rainbow of fruit flavors . . . and genders?
Yes. In fact, it’s mandatory or you’ll be accosted in restaurants and mobbed at home.
For Mad Maxine, how about peach mint?
It takes a really sick mind to come up with that one. Thank you.
I thank you for the compliment!!!
Maxine Peach Mint? Too funny! That’s a definite winner.
It’s obvious: Hillary’s Orange Jumpsuit Sorbet
Hillary’s Rocky Road, Feinstein’s Hidden Delights, Pelosi’s Nuts, Frozen Twisted Schumer, Maddow’s Virgin Delight, Morning Joe’s Whipped Fantasies, Biden’s Can’t Taste This, and Flake’s Cookie Bake.
Love! Your Biden’s Can’t Taste This opened up a whole new line of ideas for Gropin’ Joe Biden ice cream flavors.
Pelosi’s Nuts: LOL!
I don’t twit, but if I did:
“Scream at the Sky Blueberry Pie”
“Me Too Cluster Goo”
Omg, these are seriously fabulous, MrE! So loving the Me Too Cluster Goo, in particular, though. 😛
Sedition Sherbet
Chock full of coup do.
I recall one or both of these twits, Ben and Jerry, showing up at the “Occupy Wall Street” agitation in D.C., back in 2011. Playing the part of the populist entrepreneurs. Conveniently, they left out the fact that they sold their business to food and housewares giant, Unilever, for a tidy sum. Not that I begrudge them their right to cash in on their success; mind you. I just found their grandstanding in support of an anti-capitalist movement, when they’ve profited handsomely from said system, pretty damn hypocritical.
“Revisionist’s Ripple”
“Ice Ream”
How ‘bout
Diabetes II Delight
Sold Out Supreme ( they sold their company for several hundred million dollars)
Sucker’s Swirl. By their ice cream: they’ll still be worth 200 million, you’ll be six dollars poorer and sugar crashed.
Coup de Grape?
Lie a la Mode?
A Con-Dyke Bar.
HRC’s Lie Ability
Obama’s Kenyan Krunch
Cory’s Spartan Spumoni
Mao Mint.
Gulag Gelato.
Strawberry Stalin.
Cream-Puff Barack.
Commies and Cream.
Mooochelle Butterball Pecan.
Fauxcahontas Freeze.
Chappaquiddick Chip.
Bike Lock Crunch
In Your Face Raspberry
You Didn’t Build That Rocky Road
Pecan Your Window
Leftward Swirl
Blue Dress Blueberry
Keep Your Doctor Fudge
Pink Pussy Parfait
Nutty Everything
– Chicago Shooting Raspberry Swirl
– Antifa Almond Crunch
– Bike Lock Buckle
– SCOTUS Filibuster Belly Buster
– MAGA Marshmallow Dream
– Dummycrat Apricot Crumble
– Easy Peasy Leftist Sleazy
– Abortion Crunch
– Hazelnut Hypocrisy Ice
– “Ice the I.C.E.” Ice
– Venezuela Socialism Feral Dog Surprise
Bolshevik Scat Pie
Unintended Con Sequences
Sour Loose
Mao Tse Dung
Deplorabus Unum
Lost In November
No Path To 270
How did no one think of Illegal Alien ICE Cream?
The founders of said company are both Communists !
White Guilt Vanilla
True socialists should have only one flavour. I suggest Soviet Brutalism Grey. The cone will probably be empty due to unforeseen shortages.
Mooch Tracks
Cankles & Cream
Sally, Sally … Sally, Sally, Sally … Sally! Abortion Crunch? Really, Sally?!
Frankin Fudge Fondler
Wasserman Waterhellion
Barack Brokeberry
Demlicious Debt
Cryin Kaine Kiwi
imPeach
Maxine’s Nuts
Antifa Cherry Bomb
Biden’s Gropy Grape
Social Justice Fruitcake
Liz’s Squawberry & Cream
Underage Polanski Cherry
Mueller Mango Mush
Hillary’s Cookies and Crap
Barack Enligten Mint
You guys are all hilarious! I so love all of these contributions, but a few that stood out:
Coup de Grape
A Con-Dyke Bar
Mao Mint
Chappaquiddick Chip
You Didn’t Build That Rocky Road
Venezuela Socialism Feral Dog Surprise
Unintended Con Sequences (“cone sequences”?)
Cankles & Cream
Illegal Alien ICE Cream (seriously good!)
Frankin Fudge Fondler
Antifa Cherry Bomb
Biden’s Gropy Grape
Liz’s Squawberry & Cream
Barack Enligten Mint
I’m still giggling! You guys so rock!
For those who don’t use Twitter, the high level of humor, engagement with and knowledge of wide-ranging issues displayed here and on the Twitter threads stands in stark contrast to regressive hashtag games.
One always fun variation is renaming a movie or song (etc.) to meet the hashtag. For example, it might be “Rename a movie about Trump’s immigration policy.” Leftists write stuff like: “Misogynist xenophobe in Seattle” and “Racist in Seattle.” They seem to glom onto one movie or a handful of titles and then insert the rotating “isms” and “phobes.”
They are profoundly unfunny, witless, and boring. Conservative ice cream flavors would be “racist chocolate,” “Islamaphobe strawberry,” and “homophobe vanilla.” I kid you not. These are the stupidest, least-informed, most humorless people in America.