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All purpose, pre-written, generic MSM announcement of David Gregory (non) prosecution

All purpose, pre-written, generic MSM announcement of David Gregory (non) prosecution

I have been known to prepare all-purpose, pre-written, generic MSM-style announcements on the cusp of an important decision.

So here’s what I have pre-drafted for the David Gregory decision which will be released later this afternoon:

In a decision sure to have profound implications for the national gun control debate in the wake of the Newtown, CT, shooting, the Attorney General of the District of Columbia has announced that he will (not) charge David Gregory with violating D.C.’s gun laws.

Gregory, host of the NBC News program Meet the Press, displayed on air what he described as a 30-bullet ammunition magazine during an interview with Wayne LaPierre of the National Rifle Association.  The magazine is (not) in the possession of authorities and (never) was inspected by police.

After an intensive two week police investigation, the matter was handed over to the Attorney General for a decision whether to prosecute.

Some people criticized the police department’s lack of a quick arrest, while others supported the decision.  Legal experts consulted by us were divided, some saying the police were right to take their time while others said the police should have moved more quickly.

In his decision, the Attorney General explained that he was motivated by a desire to follow the rule of law giving weight to other considerations which factor into prosecutorial discretion.

Whether Gregory posed a threat to the public and his possession of the alleged magazine while engaging in journalism were (not) taken into consideration.

Gregory is represented by the high powered D.C. law firm which has represented many other celebrities facing criminal charges.

In the end, the Attorney General decided that Gregory could (not) escape prosecution in the interest of justice.

NBC News did not respond to inquiries seeking comment.

One thing is certain, the issue of gun control will continue to be debated in the coming weeks.


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MaggotAtBroadAndWall | January 11, 2013 at 4:30 pm

You need to remove the two references to “gun control”.

They’ve decided the phrase “gun control” too accurately describes their true totalitarian intent which is to persuade you to surrender, or restrict, a Constitutionally protected freedom.

In its place, I’m seeing phrases like “gun safety” often used. I’ve actually even seen one writer refer to the proposed restrictions on gun ownership as “school safety”. After all, what civilized person could ever be against “gun safety” or “school safety”?

Again, gun control is far too accurate.

Ok, so Gregory skates because of elitism and politics. But I have some questions for the elitists: where is the magazine that Gregory flashed now? Who is in possession of the magazine? Who owned the magazine when Gregory used it on the tv show.

Disclaimer: NBC, David Gregory and this Nathan creep are trained professionals. Please do not attempt to duplicate this stunt! Your small and petty ass WILL be prosecuted!

Not sure what the big deal is. I mean, we all know that if one of the NRA guys had brought a high capacity magazine to the tv studio… oh wait…