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Welcome to the Hotel ISIS

Welcome to the Hotel ISIS

You can check out any time you like…

Are you looking for a special place to visit on your summer vacation? You’re in luck.

ISIS has opened a luxury hotel in Iraq.

Heather Saul of the Independent:

Isis opens 262-room luxury hotel in Mosul

Isis has purportedly opened its own luxury hotel in Iraq’s second city Mosul for members of the extremist group to stay in while visiting.

Pictures circulated by Isis-affiliated social media accounts show members tending to a well-maintained garden, polishing floors and cleaning windows, expansive swimming pools and two black Isis flags flying at the front of the multi-storey building.

The hotel is believed to be the Ninawa International Hotel, which received a number of positive reviews on TripAdvisor before being overtaken by militants and stripped of its branding. It has 262 rooms, two restaurants, two ballrooms and a gymnasium, among other facilities.

Paul Detrick of Reason TV produced this promotional video for the hotel:

The Metro UK notes that there are some restrictions on activities at the hotel:

The Ninawa hotel was previously described on TripAdvisor as the best hotel in Iraq – boasting an opulent reception area, tennis courts, and a swimming pool.

But despite ISIS closing down all hotels in captured territories, the hotel has now been reopened, with all 262 rooms reserved for visiting commanders.

And the luxury hotel will also be available for weddings – so that jihadi brides can marry Islamic State militants on the former £65-a night site.

As for the facilities, women will be banned for swimming or playing tennis in public unless they keep every inch of flesh covered, while the hotel is likely to be patrolled by members of IS’ feared all women police brigade.

Other banned activities including drinking alcohol, dancing, smoking or gambling, and those who don’t obey risk being flogged, crucified or beheaded.

Amazing. Real life looks like something out of The Onion.

Featured image via YouTube.


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LukeHandCool | May 10, 2015 at 12:44 pm

Come for the poolside ambiance …

Stay for the mass beheading ambiance.

And if you’re gay, you get taken up to the penthouse suite, then you and your bags get thrown off the roof:

Amazing how American gays, as a unified political block for the left, are setting themselves up for genocide.

Coupla other activities I wonder if you’d be punished for…


Getting a haircut


But they have lovely, seductive goats ranging the halls on all floors! AND, for a small price, you can purchase a child (male or female) to use during your stay.

What larks.

Stupid terrorists! Don’t they know they’re ISIL, not ISIS?

Breakfast is important … how are the bacon & eggs?

Do they let you smoke in the bar? Can I get a pork chop for my dog? They gotta jeweler who can repair my rosary? How often can I beat my wife before they tell me to keep it down?

Hey, are you a terrorist?

No, but I did stay at the Mosul Inn Express last night.

An easy and productive target for a cruise missile or smart bomb.

“members tending to a well-maintained garden, polishing floors and cleaning windows, ”
New word for “slave”?