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Guide to California Crazy

Guide to California Crazy

From LukeHandCool, a handy Guide to California Crazy, with commentary:

Came across this motorized billboard on a corner of Wilshire Boulevard on L.A.’s Westside after dropping the son off at school. He’s becoming quite a politically incorrect joker and I’d just given him a little lecture to be cautious around his teachers; that it’s much safer to give the teacher a rotten, non-organic, non-fair-trade apple than to challenge his/her political sensibilities.

Anyway, behold the peak of evolution of the car as pop-art-political statement.

I call it, “Driving the Narrative: When Life Imitates Art Imitating Life: A Conversation with Still Life.”

1) “Marriage = heart + heart.” My wife has disproved this theory.

2) “Democracies Die Behind Closed Doors.” Whereupon they go to The Afterlife on the backs of cars.

3) “Earth Without Art is Just ‘Eh.'” Spoken like a true cavewoman.

4) “Imagine What We Could Accomplish if We Weren’t so Afraid of Each Other.” You first.

5) “The Most Powerful Mind-Altering Substance is the Truth.” Yeah, but I suspect the buzz it gives you won’t feel too good, lady.

6) “The Time to do the Right Thing is Always Now.” Tony Robbins just gagged.

7) “Got Aloha?” Yeah. You?

8) “I’m Already Against the Next War.” Oh! You’re a Prepper!

9) “Whatever Happens to the Water Happens to the People.” You betcha, especially when you’re talking tsunamis.

10) “If Evolution is Just a Theory, Religion is Just an Opinion.” 9 out of 10 primate species agree! Homo sapiens sapiens stupid stupid wingnuts! By the way, where in “social justice” does “survival of the fittest” come in?

11) “Freedom of Speech Means the Freedom to Disagree.” I’ll bet you say that to all your many conservative Republican friends.

12) “I’m for the Separation of Church & Hate.” — I’m for the separation of the racist, anti-Semitic Reverend Al Sharpton and MSNBC State Media. Please also separate the racist, anti-Semitic Reverends Wright, Jackson, Farrakhan, etc., from the left, and we’ll take care of the evil Mike Huckabee.


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The simple fact that someone would slather stickers all over a vehicle that cost in excess of 20 grand tells me all I need to know about a person. IOW….trust fund baby with more education than intelligence.

Note the “USAA” sticker on the left. Insurance company for military members and their families. Not sure I would want this person in my unit.

    Ragspierre in reply to NavyMustang. | March 16, 2014 at 8:47 am

    Noticed that, too. Probably the offspring of an honorable, patriotic person who served the nation.

    I bet the parent still loves the lil’ puke, too. Ah, well…

    Bigurn in reply to NavyMustang. | March 17, 2014 at 1:48 pm

    That was the very first thing I noticed. However, USAA is covering several generations these days, and it is far removed from the days of covering military officers.

    But, boy, talk about “which one of these doesn’t fit”!


Oh! You’re a Prepper!

I just can’t stop laughing!!
I would love to see that person’s face if anyone had the chance to tell him/her that.
Thank you sir. This is a great way to start my day: laughing. You just made my Sunday.

    LukeHandCool in reply to Exiliado. | March 16, 2014 at 12:48 pm

    That car may by a hybrid, but it produces a lot of smug.

    I’m around two weeks without a day off. I’m going to work today, too.

    I’m just running on fumes.

    But you made my day, Exiliado.

      Ragspierre in reply to LukeHandCool. | March 16, 2014 at 12:55 pm

      “I’m just running on fumes.”

      Which were in abundance in the Lost Angels of my day.

      Now, you may have to violate a code to get some fumes…or something

I have pointed out before this confirmation of my bumper sticker guide to political personalities.

Take a look at the cars you see festooned with as many bumper stickers as can be crammed into available space. Occasionally the theme will be religious or conservative.

But the great majority of them are leftist in orientation. I’m not against bumper stickers as such. I had a “Save Tiger Stadium” sticker until a friend pointed out it had been fourteen years since the decision to dump the old park, ten years since they’d abandoned it, and four years since they’d torn it down; as she put it, “whatever point you thought you were making, you’ve made it.”

One or two, yes…”Save Tiger Stadium,” “Vote for Smith,” “My child can beat up your honor student child,” OK. But a dozen or more. No one should be reading or trying to read those in traffic. And few people are going to stop when the car is parked and read all the stickers. So what’s the point?

My hypothesis is that it reveals a certain basic strain in leftist thinking and motivation–that the primary goal of political opinions is moral display, showing oneself and others that one is a good, decent person whose sensibilities are attuned to a higher plane. To many leftists, politics is primary a means of moral exhibitionism and moral confirmation.

If anyone has arguments with this hypothesis, please offer them.

    Ragspierre in reply to Alex Bensky. | March 16, 2014 at 11:27 am

    Well, yeah. One of the Collective’s chief attractions is the delusion of moral superiority, cheaply bought (or very expensively bought with someone’s money…not your own).

    JoAnne in reply to Alex Bensky. | March 16, 2014 at 2:58 pm

    Yes, I so agree. I wish I could attach a picture here. If you think the stickered cars are bad, do I have a house for you! Yes, all over her house – and I know it’s her because his car is devoid of all stickers while hers is covered with them. But when she started putting signs around the house, I knew she was a full-blown wacko! And the signs changed with the campaigns. The picture I have was taken in 2006, but when I went back to the old neighborhood, the signs had been updated to 2012! Just as obnoxious, too! Imagine being her neighbor!

      LukeHandCool in reply to JoAnne. | March 16, 2014 at 3:13 pm


      Years ago our son was invited to a classmate’s birthday party.

      After the party my wife brought him home and told me what a nutcase the mother was.

      My wife said she had anti-Bush, anti-Republican, etc., stickers and posters (both ones she’d bought and ones she’d made herself) all over the inside of the house and a few on the outside.

      This in a neighborhood where the houses are $2 million +

      One house a couple of blocks away from our previous residence had an art easel on the front lawn with a large print of the infamous sunflower poster, “War is not healthy for children and other living things” all through the Bush administration years.

      Once Obama was elected, it disappeared.

      I wanted to replace it at night with an easel and a homemade poster saying, “Obama’s drones are not healthy for children and other living things” but I never got around to it. Would’ve loved to see the owner’s reaction.

        JoAnne in reply to LukeHandCool. | March 16, 2014 at 4:12 pm

        Oh, my goodness, brave wife, I can’t even imagine going into this woman’s house (the one I have a picture of)! In fact, I hated walking by her house, just in case she figured out I was a conservative!

I seem to recall that a study of people whose vehicles had lots of bumper stickers on them found a strong correlation between lots of stickers and aggression.

That explains why nearly every car like that is driven by a lefty. More aggression than brains.

Bumper Sticker Psychology:

1+ sticker = Driver is a fan/agrees with the message.
2+ stickers= Driver has a strong opinion.
3+ stickers= Driver is an activist.
4+ stickers= Driver has serious issues and should seek
professional help.

This is the third or fourth time I’ve seen this car parked here, on the corner two doors down from our apartment building. He or she must frequent either the spa or the café on our block.

I’ll print out this post with all of your excellent comments and, next time I see the Bossymobile, I’ll place it under her windshield wiper for her reading enjoyment.

She’ll surely be relieved to find it’s not a parking ticket.

And she’ll no doubt be excited to read, “Aloha, Neighbor! Look! Read This! You’re Part of an Insurrection!!”

    Ragspierre in reply to LukeHandCool. | March 16, 2014 at 12:06 pm

    Might be best to pay a homeless person to do the delivery, Luke.

    Jes’ sayin’…

      LukeHandCool in reply to Ragspierre. | March 16, 2014 at 12:40 pm

      You’re probably right, Rags.

      I can look homeless myself after waking up in the morning. But I’d rather die than step outside without first “putting my face on.” I’m worse than the fussiest female diva.

      I may be clean-cut, but I have naturally bad posture. I hunch over and round my shoulders. Drives my wife crazy.

      She grabbed me one time when we were walking in public and with one hand, forced my stomach in, and with the other hand, forced me to stand up straight and stick my chest out.

      “I feel like I’m walking with an Australopithecus!” she shouted at me.

      The only thing that startled me was her knowledge and use of “Australopithecus.” For a second I thought,

      “Oh my God. Her English vocabulary has reached an amazing level for someone whose native language isn’t English.”

      So, as she was forcibly fixing my posture, I demanded, “How do you know that word??!! How do you know the word ‘Australopithecus?'”

      “It’s the same in Japanese.”


      Getting back to your idea, Rags. I’m sure the owner of this car absolutely loves homeless people … in theory. But she’d freak out if one actually touched her personal property.

        Ragspierre in reply to LukeHandCool. | March 16, 2014 at 12:57 pm

        Be sure to video the incident.

        YouTube GOLD…!!!

          LukeHandCool in reply to Ragspierre. | March 16, 2014 at 1:32 pm

          I’m gonna have to buy some little video recorder on Amazon. Something like O’Keefe uses. I think Professor Reynolds at Instapundit had a post one time recommending some to potential “citizen journalists.”

          Of course, I’d have to find out about the legality of taping someone in California.

          I’ve been thinking about visiting the ASA convention this fall at the Bonaventure and asking the participants a few questions. Try to get them to reveal their true feelings about the ASA’s Israel boycott.

          Problem is, although I’m a blowhard online, I’m actually a very shy, mild-mannered person who hates angry confrontations in person. I’d have to find some compatriots to go with me.

        Phillep Harding in reply to LukeHandCool. | March 16, 2014 at 2:08 pm

        I work with a bunch of asian women. Where the heck are those “meek and submissive” asian women I keep hearing about?

          LukeHandCool in reply to Phillep Harding. | March 16, 2014 at 2:33 pm

          It’s a trap! I was trapped!

          My wife can be absolutely ruthless with me.

          But in public she often plays the innocent, sweet, “I’m just a Japanese girl and I don’t understand” card to her advantage and gullible Americans quick to give the multi-cultural benefit of the doubt, fall for it.

          She came home one time after such an act. She walked in the front door and just stood there laughing and laughing.

          I just looked at her and asked her what was so funny.

          “I can get away with murder!!”

          She thinks we’re all just a bunch of suckers.

          She scares me at times.

          Ragspierre in reply to Phillep Harding. | March 16, 2014 at 2:46 pm

          One of the most successful “false flag” operations of alllll time!

          Asian women WILL present the persona in public. In private, they will unleash some Ninja skills, and no mistake!

          I just know there was a lost chapter in Sun Tzu about them.

    TrooperJohnSmith in reply to LukeHandCool. | March 16, 2014 at 1:57 pm

    Do what I’ve done before. Put a dissenting on the vehicle, kind of low down and out of the way, and see how long it stays there.

    I put a “Houston Gay, Houston Proud” bumper sticker on a neighbor’s loud bubba truck, and it took him a couple of weeks to discover it.

TrooperJohnSmith | March 16, 2014 at 1:53 pm

This person also listens to “Pacifica Radio”. This is funded by another foundation that uses the fruits of a great capitalist to fight Capitalism.

Houston as KPFT 91.5 (PFT = People For Truth). Listening to it is like listening to Tokyo Rose. The music is great, but you have to ignore the Marxist politics. They are listened sponsored to the extent that the Pacifica Foundation doesn’t fund them 100%. They are also the radio station whose transmitter, located in a rural location with the tower, was blown up by the Pasadena-based (TX) KKK in the early 70s whilst playing the long version of Alice’s Restaurant.

Like I say, the music is good. It’s just when they start talking that you want to puke. However, it’s nice to hear them whine about how if you don’t contribute, then you’re just stealing their music. No and don’t, and yes I do! 😆

    LukeHandCool in reply to TrooperJohnSmith. | March 16, 2014 at 2:21 pm

    I haven’t had the pleasure of listening to Pacifica Radio. I think I’ll try to tune in on the drive to work today.

    I can see putting a sticker on a friend’s car w/out his knowledge, but not on a stranger’s private property (although that thought has entered my mind on occasion).

    I have slipped a mocking note under the wiper of a car similar to this one before.

    Told them, among other things, they were lucky my disagreement with their stickers didn’t manifest as the vandalism of personal property … as their lefty brethren had perpetrated against me in the past—twisting the metal of my windshield wipers into pretzels the day after I put a Dole/Kemp sticker on (against my wife’s warnings … she’d seen Dole yard signs defaced with spraypainted swastikas just a block away) and my car vandalized with spraypaint and a sticker torn off on another occasion (Bush/Cheney).

    Like most conservatives, the most I can muster is a shrug and a roll of the eyes at stickers with which I disagree. I could never bring myself to vandalize another’s property.

    I will leave notes, though 🙂

    And take pictures!

      TrooperJohnSmith in reply to LukeHandCool. | March 16, 2014 at 6:16 pm

      It’s only vandalism if you key their paint or slash tires. That’s what Lefties do.

      A bumper sticker can be peeled off with a thumbnail. That’s a prank.

        Hugitout5 in reply to TrooperJohnSmith. | March 16, 2014 at 11:09 pm

        No offense intended officer, but if putting a bumper sticker on someone’s car isn’t vandalism, it should be.

        It’s definitely uncool either way. Y’know “I don’t touch your stuff, you don’t touch my stuff” kinda thing.

In the past week I saw two interesting vehicles.
The first had the classic Obama sticker but also had a sticker on the other side of the bumper that said “Peace Monger”.

The other said something like ” I vote pro-choice” with another sticker nearby that says “I love my Pets”.