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Spring spheres?

Spring spheres?


I caught wind of the story of a girl who was volunteering in a Seattle public school over her spring break:

“At the end of the week I had an idea to fill little plastic eggs with treats and jelly beans and other candy, but I was kind of unsure how the teacher would feel about that,” Jessica said.

She was concerned how the teacher might react to the eggs after of a meeting earlier in the week where she learned about “their abstract behavior rules.”

“I went to the teacher to get her approval and she wanted to ask the administration to see if it was okay,” Jessica explained. “She said that I could do it as long as I called this treat ‘spring spheres.’ I couldn’t call them Easter eggs.”… “When I took them out of the bag, the teacher said, ‘Oh look, spring spheres’ and all the kids were like ‘Wow, Easter eggs.’ So they knew,” Jessica said.”

This is silly on a few levels and it seems like there are two opposing ideas at play. Secularists want religion out of schools. The religious likely see no harm in expressing their religious position. Personally, though, I see two reasons either side would want to embrace the opposite of the aisle:

Secular: If you honestly find no truth or legitimate grounds in the claims of the religious despite the majority of Americans believing in some celestial being, there is very little reason to think some candy is going to reverse your decision. It’s totally possible to embrace the human element of other group holidays without believing in the spiritual aspect. After all, the most capitalist/consumerist elements of Easter are the candy, the eggs, the rabbits, which brings me to my next point…

Religious: I think that the religious could embrace this “attack.” After all, the message of Easter is about the salvation of mankind and a supernatural rise from the dead, far more impressive feats than a giant rabbit passing out empty calories. When I was growing up, a lot of the “big picture” was lost amidst my desperation to eat as much chocolate as my parents would allow (or poorly hide). Granted, it’s probably impossible for a child to appreciate sacrifice or death but an overemphasis or fierce protection of the more vapid elements of the holiday almost signals that they are more central to the celebration or appreciation of the feast than the message of the story. Simply put, that is not the case. What makes Easter important to Christians should be their promise of salvation, not what people call plastic eggs. Maybe if that element is absent in schools, it can be an opportunity for parents to teach their children at home.

Please don’t get me wrong, I think the school is absolutely wrong by enforcing this. I think the fact that they are trying to secularize the idea of Easter is offensive to all parties involved, those who don’t believe that it has any significance and those whom believe it means their salvation. (I just felt like playing Devils Advocate, twice.)

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God Help Me, I am a product of Seattle Public Schools. Being from Seattle, I know only one thing for sure:

Seattle is a great place… to be FROM.

I'm aghast that the school was not aware of or concerned with the distinction between a sphere and an egg-shape (ovoid). Though maybe they were concerned that the root word ova might be perilously close to sex ed terminology?

The discussion about the commercialization of Easter is similar to the discussion about the commercialization of Christmas in that it has nothing to do with "greed" and commercialization and everything to do with attacking Christianity. Making Easter secular by simply eliminating the word "Easter" (as is also done with "Christmas," now widely known as "Holiday" or "Winter Festival" or some such garbage) has the effect of wiping it out of our culture. It's not immediate, of course, it takes time, but it happens eventually. How many people know where Christmas trees come from or why we celebrate Christmas, Jesus' birth, in December? Wipe something out, replace it with something more acceptable, and eventually the truth is lost. Obviously, I'm not defending paganism, but this is what happens. And what is happening now against Christianity (and our culture, what does the victory mosque, originally to be called "Cordoba House" represent, what does it mean, and what does it effectively accomplish if permitted?).

This is a standard practice of leftists, and they do it with everything they hate and are particularly rabid about it when it comes to Christianity and American patriotism. They don't want to ban and/or shame people into not flying the flag for any reason other than they want to destroy the thing that flag represents. Ditto "Easter" and "Christmas." It's not the bunny or the eggs they hate, it's Christianity. This is just one more in a very long series of attempts to simply disappear it from our socio-cultural conscience (the EU just "forgot" to include Christian holidays on its calendar, for example).

Names are powerful things, language and symbols matter. No one knows this or uses it better than leftists. And no one succumbs more willingly and easily to it than conservatives. Gee, we rationalize, we can teach our kids about what Easter actually is and what it really means, just like we had to do when it was over run by colorful eggs, floppy-eared bunnies, and plastic grass. What does it matter if we stop calling it "Easter"? It matters. The left knows it.

Over thinking it. Political correctness is a cancer that will eat the heart out of this nation. You give "government" at any level the right to tell us what we call Easter eggs? You give me the rule, the Constitutional justification, or even the moral standing and I'll think about it. Short of that, this whole thing stinks like no sugary drinks in Boston and the recent attack on McDonalds. We make a mistake by allowing a minority to rule the way we live.


The really interesting part about this whole story is that Easter Eggs have no true root in Christian Religion. They are actually a Zoroastrians tradition that was originally adopted by Orthodox and Eastern Catholic Churches. The eggs have nothing to do with the Holiday of Easter and many Christians consider them to be a pagan or secular ritual to begin with. I personally don't have anything against Easter Eggs or even church organized egg hunts, as I think they can be a fun method for teaching children about the ressurection story. I'm just saying they are not part of biblical Christianity.

….I think there is another aspect to this, too. Eggs are animal based protein (or bad for you sugar) and the gang wants us all to be vegetarians or vegans, so…chalk up another reason to attack Easter. Another muddled attack with multiple lines of "reasoning."

oy… *bang*bang*bang* head on desk.

The most idiotic part of all of this? eggs aren't spheres. and indeed eggs have no real relation to Christianity anyway. so why not call it spring eggs? or holiday eggs. not that i am cool with that, either, but its at least geometrically accurate.

Oddly enough, Easter eggs are already a compromise of sorts.
There is nothing Christian about "Easter eggs" except using the term "Easter".
This is a case of secularist beating other secularists to death. There is no message of salvation or eternal life involved here.

No surprise this is coming out of a left coast city like Seattle. I'm sure it's partly based in secularism and/or political correctness but (at least to me) it also seems based in trying to chip away at self-identity. And leftists (historically) are known for initializing 'indoctrination' at a young age.

Christian parents under the old Soviet rule had a real tough call: when to tell your children about being Christian. Tell them too soon, and they won't have the savvy to hide it from the teachers. Tell them too late and they are already brainwashed by the political machinery called schools. Our public schools are the ultimate in socialist control. What did Secretary of Education Duncan say about Katrina? The best thing to ever happen to New Orleans Schools.

I'm actually an atheist, but when I come across stories about idiots like this I'm embarrassed for my kind. (I suppose I really am a ceremonial deist.) For god's sake [sic], they're Easter Eggs! And if you absolutely insist on being a raving politically correct lunatic, how about getting the geometry right at least, and calling them Equinoctial Oblate Spheroids.

It's the irony of banning the use of a pagan name for a pagan holiday, Easter, while arguing that it promotes a Christian holiday that really underscores the idiocy and intellectually lame logic that drives these people. How is this different from when that Dallas city councilor demanded an apology from a fellow councilor for using the racist word "denigrate"? Ignorance on parade. We now live in a "Lord of the Flies" world where children run everything.

sort of runic rhyme | April 11, 2011 at 5:54 pm

Public school teacher exclaims:

Lookie, colorful oblong spheroids! Now, remember, class, Easter is an island.

Ooh, they're plastic ovate potential chicks, kiddos! Which should be unfertilized or aborted to keep reproduction imperatives to a Planned Parenthood minimum, especially if you're urban and black, right?

Aah, delight in these ovoid containers heralding spring and caries, dear wards of the progressive state who'll soon want some teeth in pie-in-the-sky Obamacare!

Take heed, Little Ones, as we now gift you with representations of Nature's so-called fragile oviform that is actually super strong as a construct and absolutely perfect when manufactured for filling. Be sure to eat the Jujubes and support Palestine, 'kay?

sort of runic rhyme | April 11, 2011 at 6:25 pm

Spring's spheres or springs fears?

Those poor grade-schoolers. Life use to reduce to out-of-control controllers, and not to wordplay destroyers.

The dumbest people in America run it's schools.

Ahem. No one has mentioned that every single child exposed to this nonsense was placed in the Government Monopoly School System by his or her _parents_.

If you haven't seen "Waiting for Superman" yet, please do.

Should tell the teacher that the egg-shaped objects are actually representative of an ancient native American tradition, slightly modified by Aztec and Mayan influence, which was passed down to us only because of the black African slaves in the new world colonies who hid them from the white masters as a declaration of solidarity with the native Americans vis-a-vis the slaves' African Moslem roots.

sort of runic rhyme | April 11, 2011 at 7:19 pm

DanRetired, do you mean to say that white men laid no eggs or engaged in ovoidance behavior?

Oh Bill … you missed a really obvious point. Well, I think it's obvious:

Did you know the egg is a symbol of Christianity? Of rebirth, as in resurrection? Isn't Easter about the resurrection of The Christ?

@Fuzzy Slippers

You got that right, girl. Our two little ones go to my old elementary school … Christmas is a dirty word there now … remember back in the 1960s … the future as envisioned by Disney's tomorrowland and its Carousel Of Progress? … I couldn't wait for the future to arrive … and now it is here … and boy does it suck. It's become the Joyless Carousel of Progressivism.

"The eggs have nothing to do with the Holiday of Easter and many Christians consider them to be a pagan or secular ritual to begin with."

Correct. And "Holiday" is an English-language contraction of "Holy Day," which is why it's called "Spring/Winter Break" by secularists.

It doesn't matter. Easter and Christmas Holy Days govern the Latin Church ("Western Civilization") and the Greek/Russian Church ("Greek Orthodox Civilization") and relinquish their authority to no pezzonovante.

"I suppose I really am a ceremonial deist."

Brilliant phrase!

First of all, you know that the Seattle school district is unable to confirm that this happened. It's not school policy, and if it actually happened, it was just that teacher.

(By the way, you left out the part of that story that mentioned that the only source for it was one talking head on the radio.)

Regardless of the source, you have a logical fallacy buried in there.

If you honestly find no truth or legitimate grounds in the claims of the religious despite the majority of Americans believing in some celestial being

The popularity of a belief makes it true or false? Really? Maybe I shouldn't have given up on astrology so easily…

so you're saying that easter eggs are religious? . .. and you're saying that we're teaching kids that egg shapes are spheres ??? What do easter eggs have to do with religion?