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Every now and then someone at The New Yorker writes something witty

Every now and then someone at The New Yorker writes something witty

Not often anymore, mostly just hack attacks on Republicans.

But this is good, even if it does take a gratuitous shot at Dick Cheney, Andy Borowitz, U.S. Cancels Regular Drone Strikes on Saturdays:

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Citing budgetary concerns, the United  States announced today that it would discontinue regular Saturday drone strikes  on U.S. citizens, beginning in 2014.

In announcing the decision, the White House spokesman Jay Carney acknowledged  that the cutback in drone service was “bound to be controversial.” “In the  United States, we’ve always prided ourselves on our ability to target our  citizens with drone strikes, Monday through Saturday, regardless of the  weather,” he said. “We know that losing Saturday drone service is going to take  some getting used to.”

But the move to cut back drone service drew sharp criticism from a longtime  defender of the program, the former Vice-President Dick Cheney.“Like most  Americans, I thought I’d never see the day when drones just up and take  Saturdays off,” he said. “This would never be happening if I were still  President.”

As if to silence critics, Mr. Carney assured reporters that drones could “still get the job done” Monday through Friday, and reminded U.S. citizens to  update the government on any change of address so the drones would know where to  reach them.

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Comments

Are you sure that wasn’t from The Onion? LOL!

Personally, I can do without the “wit” of the Sons Of Belial.

Typical Prop 13 blowback.
Pick something with a high profile and make a public drama out of the termination of service.

I pity the fool who believes that the drones won’t strike on Saturday.

Henry Hawkins | February 9, 2013 at 4:52 pm

Sort of like hearing a joke from Charles Manson. The evil of the teller overwhelms the joke.

I’m still wondering why we have no drone strikes on Sunday? Or is it anything like selling beer on Sundays – you just had to wait until past noon to strike?

TrooperJohnSmith | February 9, 2013 at 8:35 pm

The funniest, most obtusely satirical piece I ever saw in the NY Times was its endorsement of Obama for reelection. It was on the OP-ED page, too, which is irrelevant, because these days, OP-ED constitutes most of that old fishwrap, except for the ads and the funnies.

I have observed Dick Cheney for most of his public career, and despite what the far left kooks would say, I don’t believe he would ever authorize the use of killer drones on an American citizen. I would not, however, go hunting with him.

The basis for this metaphorical fugue is severely flawed: the writer has failed to make the critical distinction between a drone and a schlep. U.S.P.S. carriers are schleps; it’s U.S.P.S. management that are drones.