Former President Donald Trump showed up for the Al Smith charity dinner, unlike VP Kamala Harris.
Here are some of Trump’s funniest parts.
I literally laughed out loud:
TRUMP: “That is not an easy thing to do, especially when your name is Trump and you were in “The New York Times” list. I think that must be selling like hot cakes but thank you, I appreciate it. It is a true pleasure to be with you this evening, amazing pleasure. And these days it is really a pleasure anywhere in New York with my subpoena for an appearance.”
I mean, he has a point:
TRUMP: “There is nothing to say. I guess I just don’t see the point of taking shots at myself when other people have been shooting at me for a hell of a long time. You know what they say about presidents, they say that Andrew Jackson was the president that was the most mean treated, his wife died of heart ache. She was heartbroken at the way they treated him. And they say that second was Abraham Lincoln but he was in charge of civil war. But those were the two. Andrew Jackson. Up until me, now they say it is not even close, there has never been a president treated so badly as me. And our people are not happy about it. But I was treated a little bit rough.”
Emhoff admitted to having an affair with a past nanny:
TRUMP: “A major issue of this race is child care and Kamala has put forward a concept or a plan, a lot of people don’t like it. He only piece of advice I would have for her in the event that she wins would be not to let her husband Doug anywhere near the nannies, keep them away. That was a nasty one! That’s nasty! I told the idiots that gave me the stuff, that’s too far. You know they told me the last time I did this, I was running against crooked Hillary.”
Trump even poked fun at Michigan Gov. Gretchen Whitmer’s stupid video:
TRUMP: “But I don’t think Kamala has given up yet. She hasn’t. Instead of attending tonight, she is in Michigan receiving communion from Gretchen Whitmer. That’s not a pretty sight. But Catholics, please do not be too insulted by her absence. Thank you very much.”
Crying: “Well, I had better wrap up, because Mayor Adams told me earlier that I needed to make this one very quick… the city has reserved this room for a large group of illegal aliens coming in from Texas.”
Thing is, Walz probably will say it:
“I’d like to thank our M.C. this evening, Jim Gaffigan. Most recently, Jim has been playing Tim Walz on Saturday Night Live. That’ll be a very short gig, Jim, but it was fun while it lasted!…Unfortunately, Governor Walz isn’t here himself. But don’t worry, he’ll say that he was.”
Oh, he went there: “But if you really wanted Vice President Harris to accept your invitation, I guess you should have told her the funds were going to bail out the looters and rioters in Minneapolis and she would’ve been here guaranteed.”
LOL: “There’s a group called ‘White Dudes for Harris’… but I’m not worried about them at all, because their wives and their wives’ lovers are all voting for me.”
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