Dr. Anthony Fauci declares that Santa Claus is ‘immune’ to COVID-19
In fact, he will have extra time to visit, because so many people are on Santa’s “Naughty List” . . . including CA Gov. Gavin “French Laundry” Newsom.
After the cases of Wuhan coronavirus began surging across the country in a predicted seasonal pattern, Coronavirus Task Force member Anthony Fauci declared that more restrictions were going to be imposed and Americans needed to, “Do what you’re are told“.
Shortly afterward, social media was filled with posts likening Dr. Fauci to Dr. Seuss’ infamous Grinch:
https://twitter.com/friendusanda/status/1328737339997229056?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw
Perhaps realizing that the panicked reporting on the pandemic has millions of children worried that Good St. Nick may get ill, Fauci has officially announced that Santa is immune to the virus.
Santa will be spreading lots of joy — not COVID-19 — when he visits millions of homes this Christmas.
That’s because Kris Kringle is immune to coronavirus, according to the nation’s top infectious disease expert.
“Santa is exempt from this because Santa, of all the good qualities, has a lot of good innate immunity,” Dr. Anthony Fauci told USA Today.
I suspect the statement is partly driven by the realization by Fauci that his popularity with regular Americans is rapidly waning, along with their patience. However, it must be pointed out, Santa has come down with the flu in previous years.
“Santa does not want the kids to line up waiting to see him because he doesn’t want to spread germs. Santa gets sad if the kids or their families are sick,” said Dr. Gina Song, a pediatrician at Northwestern Medicine Delnor Hospital. “So this year, Santa will be watching you from afar, giving you the gift of good health and will only visit when no one is around on Christmas Eve.”
History tells us that, even if Santa is in fact immune to COVID-19, he is vulnerable to a different illness: the flu. He’s gotten sick from it in the past. More than a hundred years ago, on Dec. 6, 1918, the St. Paul Daily News announced that “SANTA CLAUS IS DOWN WITH THE FLU.” That year, Santa was unable to attend many of his big department store visits.
I would like to take this opportunity to assure children Santa will be able to visit this year.
In fact, he is going to have lots of extra time to visit this year . . . because there are so many people now on his naughty list.
The list surely includes Gov. Gavin “French Laundry” Newsom, whose harsh, new coronavirus curfew is going to be ignored by many California sheriffs.
A California sheriff says she will not enforce Gov. Gavin Newsom’s new coronavirus curfew, according to reports.
Newsom announced a number of measures on Thursday, including limited stay-at-home orders and overnight curfews for nonessential work between 10 p.m. and 5 a.m. every Saturday until Dec. 21.
Fresno Sheriff Margaret Mims, however, said she wouldn’t be penalizing residents who didn’t follow the curfew, FOX 26 reported.
“We’ve got a lot of things to do, including taking guns away from gang members, stopping narcotic trafficking, and saving children from internet predators,” Mims said during a video briefing Thursday afternoon.
“We’re not gonna make criminals of normally law-abiding citizens.”
The department will not set up any checkpoints or pull over people to verify their reason for being out past curfew, Mims added.
Other law enforcement agencies plan to take a similarly hands-off approach to the curfew.
Merced County sheriff’s deputies, Madera police, Visalia police and Kings County deputies all plan to continue business as usual rather than refocus on the curfew.
I would conclude this post by dedicating my favorite Christmas carol to both Fauci and Newsom:
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Comments
Guaranteed not to be ignored for the next 3 months will be the Newsom recall petition. I suspect it will incur a surge in signatures very soon.
Fauci needs to just be utterly ignored…maybe the little narcissist will just go away then
Unfortunately, Trump Derangement Syndrome has the power to cloud people’s minds, including nurses that I used to work with.
Fauci contradicts Trump, so everything Fauci says must be completely true.
Sad, very sad.
Distance from active, symptomatic cases (i.e. coughing, sneezing). Disinfect with soap and water to mitigate fecal (i.e. contact) transmission. Avoid Planned Parent facilities. Seek early treatment (e.g. HCQ cocktail) to mitigate disease progression. If you wear a mask, know its limitations (e.g. time, environment, transmission mode, particle characterization, construction, reuse/recycle/repurpose), and don’t forget the goggles. The eyes are a window to contagion.
1. Giving Fauci a charitable interpretation, he suddenly found himself treated like one of the most important people in the universe. Almost anyone would enjoy it and want it to continue. The desire for more adulation would bias his judgment, even if he tried his best to be completely honest.
2. Everyone’s going to die someday. Get over it. Don’t go crazy in either direction (living in terror vs. ignoring the problem).
So…neither Santa nor the kids sitting on his lap need to wear the stupid masks.
Actually, healthy (symptom-free) people don’t need to wear masks, either: https://www.nature.com/articles/s41467-020-19802-w
Someone needs to put Fauci out of our misery.
I’m waiting for the Batman-slapping-Robin meme with Fauci in place of Robin, telling Batman to do what he’s told.
You’re a mean one, Mr. F
You really are a louse,
“Just do as you’ve been told,
And never leave your house”,
Mr. F,
You’re just a little tosser
With a bucket for a mouth!
So it’s OK to have Santa drop by for Christmas, but if I have my brother and cousin over for Thanksgiving, I’m guaranteed to get COVID, will have the police raid my house, and won’t be able to go to the Black Friday sales the next day that nobody has seen fit to cancel. 8 people in my house, 8,000 people in Walmart or Target – which is the greater threat? Obviously, my family, none of whom have COVID, but they’re sure to spread the disease to thousands upon thousands by sitting down to a meal with me.
Disappointed in Georgia Governor Brian Kemp’s election actions, but with regard to the Chinese virus, he’s done fine.
Here in Georgia, almost everything I do is normal, normal, normal.
Except getting my hair done. The cosmetology board is insane. PUT your CeLL phone in a BAGGIE! Pray tell, what for?
The guy is an asshole and a corrupt hack.
My grandmother gives better advice than this scumbag.
But does your grandmother fund covert Chinese biological warfare labs to create weaponized coronaviruses?
Fauci is a whore, and on the same low level as Kamala Harris.
The only difference between them is only a blind person would pay Fauci for sex; Harris still has useful orifices.
We can all dress up as Santa and go about our daily business, host our family for big Christmas dinners. I’m on board!
Santa dying of COVID seems like the most 2020 thing that can happen at this point…
“Dr. Anthony Fauci declares that Santa Claus is ‘immune’ to COVID-19”
Next week Fauci will say Santa Clause ISN’T immune.