A Florida man faces federal charges because he wanted to blow up Target stores along the east coast in an attempt to lower stock prices. I am not kidding.

Federal authorities have charged Mark Charles Barnett, 48, “with possession or a possession of a destructive device affecting commerce by a previously convicted felon.” The man he hired to put those bombs on the shelves turned him in.

The Orlando Sentinel reported that Barnett supplied that man with “at least 10 explosives, a bag of gloves, a mask and a license-plate cover, which would be used to cover up the man’s identity.”

Barnett told the man to “start at Syracuse and work your way back down [to Florida].” He wanted one bomb in each store:

He showed the person 10 devices hidden in emptied-out containers of stuffing mix, breakfast bars and pasta, authorities said.

“Barnett told the [confidential source] not to let the box bounce around or they would explode,” according to the complaint. He reassured the source that they wouldn’t kill anybody, it said, but they would “take your hand off.”

An explosives expert confirmed that Barnett’s bombs could cause “property damage, serious injury, or death to nearby persons upon detonation.”

Authorities also found “[R]ocket motor ignitors, M-5000 explosives and batteries” at Barnett’s house.

Turns out Barnett is a registered sex offender. He is on “probation for kidnapping, multiple counts of sexual battery with a weapon or force, and grand theft.”

Barnett faces 10 years in federal prison. Authorities are holding him without bond.