2015: the year feminism won all the things… or at least an entire award show.

Nestled in between articles like, “The Thong is Dead!” and “17 Butts From ‘Dating Naked,'” the astute publication Cosmopolitan recounted the Golden Globe award show in an intellectually stimulating article entitled, “Who Won the Golden Globes? Women. Feminism got top billing at last night’s awards.”

The article explains:

At the Golden Globes last night, it was hard to miss the feminist overtones. Two funny female hosts. Shout-outs and thank-yous to the trans community. Some of Hollywood’s most seasoned feminist activists taking the mic. Famous men declaring themselves proud husbands. Recognition of rape survivors.

But what about Amy Adams who had the gall to thank strong women in the room for being fabulous role models?

Some of the feminism on display was the kind of cookie-cutter you-go-girl-ism present at just about any award show in the past 30 years — see Amy Adams breathlessly thanking all the strong women in the room for being good role models for her 4-year-old daughter.

Pssh. So, 2014. Get with the times, Amy!

That desire to be heard and recognized set the tone for the night, and women led the way.

Sometimes I think “feminists” live in an alternative universe. How have women in this country been ignored?

And then there were the men. Despite a handful of typically boorish remarks — Jeremy Renner commenting on Jennifer Lopez’s “globes,” for example — socially conscious men showed up last night.

By “socially conscious” they mean men who give them the attention they want.

George Clooney was also in top feminist form.

He took an early ribbing from Fey and Poehler good-naturedly, when Fey pointed out that Clooney’s wife, Amal Clooney (née Alamuddin), is a “human rights lawyer who worked on the Enron case, an adviser to Kofi Annan on Syria, and was appointed to a three-person commission investigating rules of war violations in the Gaza strip.” “So tonight her husband is getting a lifetime achievement award.”

Ok, that’s kind of funny; but it’s also a false comparison. In the context of his chosen career, Clooney is about as accomplished as they come. Sadly, Feminist Rule requires that his accomplishments be compared to those of his wife because, well, he’s not a chick.

Just imagine if such a scenario was reversed… “He’s won countless awards, engaged in humanitarian efforts, has been a stalwart of masculinity on the silver screen, spoken before Congress, and his wife who works as an attorney is getting an award.” The resultant wailing and gnashing of teeth would be enough to make Hades jealous.

Maggie Gyllenhaal’s acceptance speech was lauded as “the feminist speech of the night.”

“Nuanced, thoughtful, and honest, she skipped simplistic Girl Power cliches and touched on what truly made this past year’s roles for women so important,” Cosmo says. I can’t help but wonder if we were listening to the same speech. Don’t get me wrong, Gyllenhaal’s speech was sweet, but that’s about it.

No feminist post can be complete without talking about the alleged pay-gap. Cosmo’s was no different:

Of course, women in Hollywood are still often underpaid compared to their male counterparts, and diversity in color, size, nationality, gender identity, and ability often sorely lacking.

It’s true that there appears to be a gender-pay inequity in Hollywood. Top paid male actors like Robert Downy, Jr. make about $75 mil a year while their female counterparts like Sandra Bullock make about $51 mil.

That being said though, never have I crossed an article on Hollywood’s pay-gap issues that takes into account variables such as franchise or frequency of work. Robert Downy, Jr. for instance, is on the Marvel wagon, and therefore likely to rake in more dough than those working in the “not-a-guaranteed-blockbuster” camp.

Talent is also a mighty subjective issue. So I have to put an asterisk next to this one for that reason. Particularly when digging into how Hollywood paid men versus women in it’s early years doesn’t seem to show much pay disparity, if any.

We make light of modern “feminists” — their illogic and hypocrisy, but most troubling is that there seems to be an uncomfortable amount of crossover between modern “feminism” and text book sexism. Men are denigrated and viewed invaluable simply because they are male—nless of course with every breath they extoll femininity, in such cases they might get a pass.

And so “feminists” have come almost full circle… becoming what they claim they hate.

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