Instead, use the terms:
“Nearly Worthless AP” or “Almost Worthless AP”
Because AP is not literally Worthless. Hell, even Newsweek sold for a buck.
For consistency of message, here is a succinct summary of President Obama’s position on AP:
Obama has said he believes AP has the right to publish as a matter of press freedom, though he’s also said he won’t take a position on whether they should actually publish.